Business Studies Jokes

Six interesting questions asked in HR interview
Question 1:
"What will you do if I run away with your sister?"
Answer:
The candidate who was selected answered " I will not get a better match for my sister than you, sir."
Question 2:
Interviewer (to a student girl candidate) -
What if one morning you woke up & found that you were pregnant ?
Answer:
I will be very excited and take a day off, to celebrate with my husband. (Normally an unmarried girl will be shocked to hear this, but she managed it well. Why should I think it in the wrong way, she said later when asked.)

Question 3:
Interviewer: He ordered a cup of coffee for the candidate. Coffee arrived and was kept before the candidate, then he asked "What is before you?"
Answer:
Candidate instantly replied "Tea" and got selected.
The question was "What is before you U? (alphabet). Reply was "TEA" T (alphabet).

Question 4:
Where Lord Rama would have celebrated his "First Diwali"
Answer:
People will start thinking of Ayodya, Mithila [Janaki's place], Lanka etc...
But the logic is, Diwali was a celebrated as a mark of Lord Krishna Killing Narakasura. In Dusavataar, Krishnavathaar comes after Raamavathaar.
So, Lord Rama would not have celebrated the Diwali !

Question 5:
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, it's raining heavily, when suddenly you pass by a bus stop, and you see three people waiting for a bus:
1. An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.
2. An old friend who once saved your life.
3. The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.
Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing very well that there could only be one passenger in your car?
Answer:
He simply answered:
"I would give the car keys to my old friend and let him take the lady to the hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my dreams."

Question 6:
The interviewer asked the candidate "This is your last question of the interview. Please tell me the exact position of the center of this table where you have kept your files."
Answer:
Candidate confidently put one of his finger at some point at the table and said that this was the central point at the table. Interviewer asked: "How did you decide that this is the central point of this table?", then he answers quickly that: "Sir you are not supposed to ask any more question, as it was the last question as you promised."
And hence, he was selected as because of his quick-wittedness.

"THINK OUT OF THE BOX!"





All Is Fair In Business

A shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own
opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read 'BEST DEALS.'

He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and
announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading 'LOWEST PRICES.'

The shopkeeper panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign
of all over his own shop. It read: 'MAIN ENTRANCE'
Robbery in Bank


There was this robbery in Guangzhou , the robber shouted to everyone: "All don't move, money belongs to the state, life belongs to you".Everyone in the bank laid down quietly.
This is called "Mind Changing Concept -Changing the conventional way of thinking
--------------- --------------- --------------- ----
When the robbers got back, the younger robber (MBA trained) told the older robber (who is only primary school educated), "Big bro, let's count how much we got", the older robber rebutted and said, "You very stupid, so much money, how to count, tonight TV will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!"
This is called "Experience –nowadays experience is more important than paper qualifications!
--------------- --------------- --------------- ----
After the robbers left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. The supervisor says "Wait, wait wait, let's put the 5 million Rs we embezzled into the amount the robbers robbed".
This is called "Swim with the tide --converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage!"
--------------- --------------- --------------- ----
The next day, TV news reported that 100 million Rs was taken from the bank. Therobbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count 20 million Rs. The robbers were very angry and complained "We risked our lives and only took 20 million Rs the bank manager took 80 million Rs with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!"
This is called "Knowledge is worth as much as gold !"






Gabbar Singh was a MANAGEMENT GURU as is reflected in some of the timeless management lessons he delivered thru the movie Sholay.

1. Jo Darr Gaya Samjho Mar Gaya - Courage and enterprise are important factors for laying the successful foundation of a growth oriented business.

2. Kitne Admi The ? - It's important to know the competition and its size. He understood that even a small team can make a difference.

3. Arey O Sambha, Kitna Inaam Rakhe Hai Sarkar Hum Par ? - Promoting one's own brand is very important and to be reiterated always.

4. 6 Goli, Aur Aadmi 3! - Create an illusion where his insurbodinates had a chance of survival but kills them in the next scene. Moral - Perform or perish.

5. Le Ab Goli Kha - Sometimes in the interest of the organisation you have to take hard and unpopular decisions.... So sometimes a leader has to 'fire' some employees.

6. Yeh Ramgarh Waale Apni Betiyon Ko Kaunsi Chakki Ka Aata Khilate Hai Re - Market research is important to understand value propositions !!

7. Yeh Haath Mujhey Dedey Thakur - Identify elements of threats in the market and take measures to minimise them.

8. Holi Kab Hai, Kab Hai Holi ? - Conduct advance mapping of key events within the industry and devise penetration strategy to have a competitive edge over your rivals.

Dear students do watch the video below to find the type of students during VIVA Exam . I am sure this video will make u laugh .
This video is purely for entertainment purpose and not to hurt anyone.




Dear students - Watch the video below . You will surely relate to it being a Commerce Student



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